Ukraine War: Talking to children about trauma

Children and trauma

Children can be emotionally affected by tragic events regardless of how far away they happen. So adults should be willing to have tough conversations with kids about Ukraine, the pandemic, natural disasters, and more.

With everything going on in the world, including Russia's recent invasion of Ukraine, mental health professionals say doing check-ins with children of all ages is important. Adults should take steps to start those tough conversations.

Our instinct can sometimes make us want to avoid talking to kids about tough subjects on the news because we don't want to upset them. With events unfolding on TV and across social media at high speed, the best way to address the conversation is head-on and with sensitivity, experts say.

Dr. Eugene Beresin of the Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds at Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston said that a child doesn't need to be physically close to a disturbing event to be emotionally affected by it.

"Many, many, many children who witnessed 9/11 on TV, who witnessed Oklahoma bombing, who witnessed the Challenger disaster on TV got post-traumatic stress disorder," Beresin said. "The media is huge."

Beresin said young children, tweens, and even older teens have some basic questions when it comes to war, whether they verbalize them or not: Am I safe? Are you, the people taking care of me, safe? How will this affect my day-to-day life?

Get breaking news alerts in the free FOX5NY News app | Sign up for FOX 5 email newsletters

"They know things are troubled. They know things are problematic. They may ask you if you're worried. Kids of all ages may ask if you're worried," Beresin said. "And frankly, you got to be honest. You can say, 'Yes, I am, but we can manage this. We can get through this.' I would indulge them a little bit."

Dr. Nick Hatzis of Compass Health Center in Chicago said parents need to "create a space that allows for listening."

"You also want to make sure you're always in touch with how you're feeling about the situation," Hatzis said, "because our kids will look to us to see how we're reacting to things."

If your child asks questions, it may not be that they are terrified or upset. Many kids will just ask questions out of curiosity. Younger kids may not know about the conflict, so approach them with a "What have you heard?" question and go from there.

With older kids, helping them sort through all the information and asking for their opinion is key, especially for those who may be more anxious than others.

"There's going to be a lot of back and forth," Hatzis said. "We want to make sure that we are actively promoting our routines, our schedules, participating in the meaningful activities in our lives and in our kids' lives."

No matter how you decide to address the invasion of Ukraine, be honest and willing to listen, experts say.

With The Associated Press and Fox News.